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In the Face of Change, Be Yourself


It can feel like you are losing yourself in the face of change, especially when life seems to descend into chaos. I know because I’m experiencing it right now.

I’m going through big life changes, some good, some bad, but all unsettling – each day as my life looks less-and-less like it once did, I’ve been left wondering what I can hold onto that never changes… And then I remember the answer – myself.

I’ll always be the same because, no matter what happens in my physical world, I am not the exterior of my life, nor am I made up of anyone else. I am, and always will be, my inner self. My true self. My soul. And no matter what happens, no one can take that from me or change it in me.

You too can learn to look within and gain clarity during challenging and unsettling times – here are my suggestions.

You Don’t Need Rescuing, You Are Your Rescuer

We have the option of stepping into two roles when times are hard or challenging – the victim or survivor. The victim role will cause you to feel worse about your situation. That “poor little me” voice is oh so unhelpful. A victim cannot be helped by oneself because a victim is expecting to be saved.

The victim role is so tempting when you think you need to be rescued. But I can assure you that not only can no one else rescue you, you can rescue yourself. You don’t need anyone to save you because you are fully capable of doing that yourself. Everything you need to pull yourself through your current situation, is in the survivor role.

You simply have to stop expecting anyone to change a single thing for you, and be willing to change everything for yourself. You have to be willing to take control and do everything in your own power to make your life how it is supposed to be. Even if it means making it unrecognisable.

Trust the Process of Life

It might not feel it right now, but change is good. Even if things are seemingly chaotic, these moments are for a reason – they are happening to allow better and more destined times to enter your life.

Let’s look at what life is – it’s a series of happenings, and it wouldn’t work without change. Those who are wanting or expecting it to always be the same, are not living a reality.

It isn’t supposed to be motionless and rigid, it’s supposed to take us on wild, wonderful and awful journeys that allow us to become ever closer to who we really are.

When I look back at my past, I can see clearly how my difficult moments were directly followed by incredible times. My greatest moments came right after my hardest.

Trust the process of life, put every bit of your faith into it. And follow every sign that you notice along the way because those signs are there to guide you in the direction that is meant for you. And don’t be afraid of getting your path wrong because what is meant for you, won’t pass you.

Don’t Settle

Lots of people settle for a life they don’t want just because it’s easier than rocking the boat. It’s easier than dealing with the chaos, even if the chaos leads to more happiness. It’s easier just to allow the days, weeks, years to pass without shaking things up. But how tragic is that? Are you really willing to reach the end of your life, and say “I didn’t live, but I was comfortable?”

I cannot think of anything more tragic…

Don’t settle for a job that pays poor and overworks you. Don’t settle for a partner that doesn’t make you feel good about who you are. Don’t settle for an ordinary life. Just don’t settle. Keep moving, refuse to settle, refuse to stay still in your life.

Keep creating higher standards for where you want to take your life – constantly evolve. As you evolve, you will notice the things that no longer align with you, which gives you the option to change them.

You are on a journey right now, it’s called life, it’s not forever, so don’t waste it!

“I Choose to Make the Rest of My Life The Best of My Life.” – Louise Hay

Stephanie Dunleavy
Co-founder of Soul Analyse

Stephanie is a professional writer, blogger and the co-founder of Soul Analyse.

While she always tries to live in the moment, she feels it's equally important to look back at past experiences with open eyes to connect the missing dots and work out what we can learn for the future. She uses writing as a way to share her story with others in the hope that her past experiences can help someone else moving forward. She's also keen to gain knowledge from others' experiences and believes we can learn a great deal from one another!

Visit Stephanie's Instagram.

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